another time I'm sitting hear and wait for the washing machine to finish ;) it's nearly 2 a clock in the morning and I'm in front of a milion things that I should and could still do tonight. I don't feel bad about having gone out tonight, at least it made me feel kinda all right. After having realized that one of my wheels has been stolen and then also had to buy a book I didn't want to for too much money...well then Badminton was good fun and had a great time at the etnic and then just listening to some music with the guys and a beer.

Le tue parole m'incantano ancora, traformano la realtà per un po'....quanto che so che è meglio non pensarci su...tanto non riesco a batterti fuori della mia testa...e oggi il pensiero a te e anche legitimato...buon compleanno libero!


still have to talk about my trip to Napoli here...sure will do soon...but before there's a AFS weekend in front of me...

It was kinda a crazy week that one... We still had some university classes but nothing really happend there... Tuesday night party with my classmates...and it was kinda cool to get to know some of them in another way...I even got to talk to some of the ones in the front ... Then Yenga at the place of the south americans, was pretty cool. Caro's back!!! I really like that. With all them people leaving all the time, it's good having somebody who came back for once...
Spent Saturday afternoon in Altdorf, made the traditional (2nd time ;) ) easter-egg-hunt all around the town with the gang...was funny as. Fortunately Sandra didn't hate me for too long as we were a team.
At night I went out with Co, Mü, Sä and Sa, we just went for a drink basically...I was by car as it was snowing (!!!!!) We very being very very silly...making up rules on how to talk and so on...It's good to just laugh and eat way too much chocolate and sweet for once...
Other highlights of this week, playing soccer...South America against Europe...and met the new guy in our team...we lost anyway in the end... I guess that's my way of slowly learing Spanish...It just takes some time, but I'm not very patient.
Next Tuesday leaving for Naples...can't wait to get there and see Sabrina again, might even meet her brother, whom I like very much. My parents are afraid as of course, as it is known as a dangerous city... But I just read an article about Medellin today and so I guess dangerous is kinda relative...
Today my grandparents are here as it is easter. It used to be something special with me going to church around 4 times these days...Even though I'm aware that I no longer belong there and wouldn't wanna go, I still miss parts of it...the big moment of lighting the new easter-candle, the carrying of the cross, ringing the church bells... When I look out of the window I can see our church, and I have to say that my town wouldn't be the same without it... I should get some work done, as usually I'm just not in the mood...

III. Zeitlieder

Wo ruhig sich und wilder
Unstete Wellen teilen,
Des Lebens schöne Bilder
Und Kläng verworren eilen,
Wo ist der sichre Halt?
So ferne, was wir sollen,
So dunkel, was wir wollen,
Faßt alle die Gewalt.
(Eichendorff)

uff...it's better I'm not going home tomorrow but to Lucerne where I'll meet Isa, Helen and Julia, maybe Lea... It's gonna be good being around them instead of feeling paralized eithere here or in Uri...then Sunday birthdayparty of my dad.
What's happend during the last days?! Last night I stayed up until 3.30 talking to Julia, midnight-beer which basically means "I need to talk"... it felt good, seeing the moon go down, kinda felt like waiting to see the sun go up as well... I mean sleeping is overrated. But then I went to bed anyway, not without writing some lines and not without reading Rimbaud for cooling me down a bit, getting me back to this world. Then last night's dream was a torture to wake up from. As dreams always do, it had made possibile was now even from my point of view seems impossible...
Today I was incredibly happy, given the circumstances of not feeling actually so good. But uni was cool, today was a very strange day as far as university goes. I spoke 3 times, two of whom not only like a couple of words...and I saw heads turning to face me, to see who's that who talks... It felt good, that's me...not bloody afraid of speaking in public. The voting with 16 story came up again, and we were in four (in a pretty large group) who went for it. The rest said no! I'm very surprised about that... I mean I'm and have been for quite a while convinced that it's a good idea... but as I used to think it's normal that my old class didn't agree with me...I thought people here are diffrent, more diffrent opinions and so on...But it's ok, I don't say I'm right there...you cannot know what's right...
Talking about Taboo's I got quite angry with a classmate of mine today... even though I didn't say or show anything... I cannot accept that opinion which I see as a personal violation of my freedom. But I guess at the moment's not the right moment to face those kinda questions...
Badminton was a crack up though, lost all my games today ;) They must've thought I'm even worse than usually, guess am only tired...

that says it all I guess...

Weekend in Uri...was mostly a step back into the past...Saturday I went to the best place in the whole canton, the Kantonsbibliothek, visited my grandma and son on... Then I went out with my mates from school... we bout lollies and strange drinks (from Kamikaze to Mojito Razz, Bellini, the one and only Eve and a Alibi-coke) and then moved on to drinking only Schorli (non-alcoholic drinks), talking about who amongst us is going to be the first married...(nobody went for me...strange)
Then Costa, the place I used to spend every Friday and sometimes even Saturday night...there were even some people... I can say that more or less I spent Saturdaynight kissing, sounds good doesn't it?! In fact...I mean I knew mostly everyone in there, you kinda have to say hi and goodbye...and since we're swiss (german) it's 3 kisses...sums up to be a lot of them...I could live without, especially the whole f****** smalltalk. But don't get me wrong, I had a good time being there and seeing my people.
Today Winterhorn, the most probably last day on my snowboard for this year. The weather was basically horrible, which means...snowing, no sun and windy as hell! But the people were all chilled (the freestyle contest didn't quite happen but well...) and finally I managed to see Michelle again so it was an awesome day all together. Then got some tea and cake at her place and just chating as in the good old days...which we wouldn't live so far away from each other...Sure gave me something to think about that whole weekend...hmm.
On the train Ursina and I met some italian girl who needed our company as defence against the crazy army guys...they really were freaking annoying today and the train was just a mess when they finally left.

The past seems so far away at times...I know that I did good getting out of Uri...being there I always remember how I used to be...craving to get out. Wanted to add something here...but can't think of nothing interesting...well it's time to get some sleep anyway...

And Switzerland will always be Switzerland and Italy will be Italy. I feel connected with both of them countries...and as much as I don't like it, I'm kinda proud to be part of the Swiss side of the thingy... Why? I didn't do anything for it, I know...and I'm what we call "Swiss by accident"... The most interesting diffrence: When I'm sitting in a italian train which is late (the usual) I can start thinking about how to get home, I can start imagining scary nights at italian train stations and I cannot count on any help. When I'm on a swiss train, and it's late for only 14 minutes, they will keep me updated on every minute that's more or less and I'll be personally asked where I'm going and if I need to catch some connecting train. Et voilà, a country in which certain things work pretty well. Uffa...
Last weekend a 15 year old person died just down the road from my house, if I had been home, I would've heard the crash. I hardly thought about it, until I saw the flowers and candles lying there today. And suddenly inside of me I felt as if my soul got company, of the poor innocent person that became murder, of the best friend that lost that and will feel bad for all of his life and I was interely sad.
But if you think that this day stopped right there, you're wrong. I came back to Uri where there was some snow still and it was freezing cold. Driving to my hometown my mom explains me why there's so many cars on the road...”It's because of Blocher”...Me: “????????????” She: “Yeah, he's been here today, talking about I don't know what...”(research on the official SVP homepage couldn't clear that either...: “Abgew. (ählt?) Bundesrat Dr. (yeah!!) Christoph Blocher: 4 Jahre im Bundesrat – Eine Standortbestimmung”...-->uffa..) So, one weekend Belusconi comes to Torino when I'm there and then good old Blocher in my hometown....what the hell is going on here? Is it time to change my political beliefs..maybe that's what they're trying to tell me ;)

Pero todo esto no era nada para mí, era para «cualquiera», para normales...

Just came back from a trip to Turin to finish the Italian-trip weekends. It was a crazy day all together and we finished it with making a strawberry-milkshake for about 10 people (we're in two) ...
So I just have to mention that I met Berlusconi today ;) Imagine how shocked I was getting to the place we wanted to meet Anna and Giuseppe and hearing that guy instead. It was funny as!! He was talking and talking and talking and of course we went to have a look... was easy getting to see him as there was hardly any people...I mean it's Berlusconi in the end... Only empty words anyway and I guess the Italians know that too well now... Sabrina wanted to get me on a picture with him but it didn't quite work...she found it rather amusing to see him and she told Lily and Karthik how much I dislike him ;)
I did like though the girl that kept on screaming and the young people with the poster, was hard finding any anti-people !!
Then ate some Falafel at the Po, barefoot and with the most wonderful bike :) Had an Icecream of course, visited the King (but he wasn't home and so we didn't get in ;) ) and then went to learn some stuff about Egypt.
Italian streets are pretty crazy! I mean we got lost all the time, because there's no way you could possible see the streetsigns until it's too late anyway. I would never wanna drive there!! Most enjoyed though, the streetlights with all three colours at the same time! It's clear to me why nobody cares if it's red or not...
Another wonderful experience was being stuck in between Switzerland and Italy for about 15 min...and being screamed at by all kind of policemen... (but I ran around a bit, jumped and had fun anyway...) Those guys have no clue, really! But one of them was nice and ask me: "So how do you possibly pronounce that guys lastname?" Indian name's are just two long, I wouldn't wanna give it a try ;)
So our Italian, Indian, Chinese, German and Swiss team had a lot of fun today...and I'm interely tired, but unfortunately will have problems sleeping because I drank two cokes on the way back ;)

come va il mondo?
I don't know...At the moment I'd often love to shut up forever, just be and keep to myself... there's not much that actually makes sense being said. Trying to cure myself with distance to the things that hurt doesn't help in the end...I don't know, it's just wanting to scream and feel and be alive. But then I suddenly get the feeling that I wake up, after a too long time of sleep, and I see the world, I feel the world, nearly too much. And I can smile again because of little things, colours and things people usually walk by without notizing at least for a short while.
Yesterday night we said goodbye to Gabriele, after having done the same with the Annas it's enough I feel, I don't want the castle of people who're surrounding me fall apart even more. But the evening was very nice. Aperitivi, Pasta and Toblerone-Mousse with a couple of beers and 11 people! Then we went to the concert of "Le Braghe corte" and I liked it very much! Just dance. Although there was hardly anybody doing it, I felt as if this place would've been very sad without us. Poor Bologna-guys... Mitico il salto di Gabriele...troppo divertente! Now theweekend coming up, which means the last of a lot of trips to Italy...we gonna visit l'Anna bionda in Torino. I'm gonna bring my bubbles ;)
What's a life without accomplishing anything? What's a day without doing anything? What are swallowed feelings? ...

What about a little bit of music :)

Cannot longer say only Colombian songs are sad...

summer is on his way I can feel it...shirt and shorts, barefoot, lake, windsurf, smiles, sun, icecream, holidays, work, Uri....well I can't wait for it to come...at the same time I'm pretty sure this is going to be an awesome semester! I like my classes, sociology is awesome and all the rest interesting too... and the summer brings my will to learn and be and smile back :)
I got some projects and they make me kinda happy. That's how it should be I guess. Even though I'm stressed already...but well.
It's Sabrina's birthday today...so we're going to Como to eat at the Japanese... I'm more in Italy than home at the moment, and that's a matter of fact!
Weekend at the lake Garda and in Venice...was pretty awesome even though the weather was crappy. It started off at the border where he asked: "Nationalità?" "Italian, Swiss, Chinese and German"...."Hoppla...go on" So we did ;) In Venice we waited ages for a boat to arrive but it didn't...so we had to run back to the station...I enjoyed myself a lot while doing, the tourist around us a bit less, and Lily didn't quite have the right shoes ;)
Finally I got my exams results...but it's just not that funny doing well when there's others who dont'...espiacally as it doesn't quite matter as much for me as for them...
Already quite involved with university..several group works...and other stuff to do...first working-night's coming up on the horizon. But there's one about xenofobia and I'm looking forward to it...the other one's about terrorism, which sounds interesting too.

Ach...wenn jetzt sommer wär...aber es geht nicht mehr lang.